"Can I have some Irish Sausages please, asked Paddy."
The Assistant looked at him and asked "Are you Irish?"
"If I asked you for Italian Sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?
Or, if I asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?
Or if I asked you for a Kosher Hot Dog, would you ask me if I was Jewish?
Or, if I asked you for a Taco, would you ask me if I was Mexican?
Would ya, ay? Would Ya?"
The assistant says, "Well no".
"And if I asked you for some Bourbon Whiskey, would you ask me if I was American?
What about Danish Bacon, would you ask me if I was Danish?"
"Well, I probably wouldn't,"
With self-indignation, the man says, "Well, all right then, why did you ask me if I'm Irish just because I asked for Irish Sausages?"
The Assistant replies, "Because you're in ****ing Homebase."

Hehehe

I dont get it

Mark

A Catholic priest was told by his bishop that he was spending too much time in his sermons slagging the English and he was to tone them down a bit. Sunday came and he starts telling the tale of the last supper. Jesus asked the disciples one by one if they would betray him, and they all replied " No Father oi'd nivver" until it came to Judas who replied "What, me old chap?"