steve m
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| posted on 11/8/12 at 03:58 AM |
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Following on, from my m8 filling his teeth with metal filler
After my prevous post re metal filler to repair a broken tooth
yes he did do it! has promted me to write some more of what this guy has done over the years
Were do i begin!
The scene
He lives in a static caravan, on a caravan park, for about 10 years, the van itself must be 30 + years old
he fitted a power shower to replace the bath, the shower was fitted on to the bathroom wall, that backed onto his bedroom
so now all the pipework wiring power pump etc is now dangling on his bedroom wall, and very untidy
untidy is just the start, as the water supply was made up of garden hose jubille clips and sellotape, (i am not kidding)
So, to cover this abortion of plumbing oddments, he has constructed a wardrobe, to hide the hideous problem
he duly fills his wardrobe with 98% of his clothes, and in a fit of desperation has a shower, infact the first time i believe the shower had been
used, alll fine so far, untill the shower stops pumping water
His wardrobe, is full of water, due the sellotape not holding!
The bathroom floor episode
Last year he walked into his bathroom for a crap, and the whole bathroom floor collapsed, and left dangling the shower tray
the sink pedastol and the toilet, how, i do not know, the missing floor to the ground was about four feet
i did see the pics, and will try to find them!
his repair to the floor, was a wooden pallet, with a piece of chipboard on top, jacked up from below, with bricks and wood, brieze blocks, and
anything else he could find
Its still like that today, and i wont walk in there!
His cars, goan!
He turns up at my house, as his car had a problem, i can not remember what
A ford escort hatch back, the car was a mess, a real mess, and was filled to the roof, and tailgate with shite, old clothes, shoes, burger wrappers,
boxs, just shite, and i refuse to even go near the car, before he clears out all this crap
so, i go in to make some tea, and give him about 20 bin bags,
by the time i go back, about 6 bags of crap are on my drive, and the car still looked full,
anyway he continues, and from memory, he had 18 bags of rubbish, and thats when we found it!
he had a f ing mountain bike in the back as well, that he had no idea why, or whos, all complete, with handlebars wheels etc, and pretty well ready to
ride!!!!
oh, and and an 17" computor monitor, that he did admit to owning, but had lost it a while back???
i wish i had taken pics, as no one would ever believe this, although he did tell a couple of work mates,
I did what ever it was to his car, and he went to the tip (i believe)
Another car he had was an Austin Maestro, that also suffered with being a mess, yet he had the forsight to rearrange the lettering on the back to Tin
mess, very apt
I will add some more later, as its 0441 am, im tired, and ive still got 2.5 hours to go at work
Ive just thought of another classic, and while its in my head..............
So, he is home, goes to his car, and has a puncture, goes to the spare, and its flat, so what does he do???
yep, a classic, he goes to a trailer parked in his "alloted area" (MESS) and takes a wheel off, to use that instead, back to his car and
of course the PCD is wrong, so he takes the wheel of his car, and this is brilliant, paints tippex on the wheel studs, and offers up the trailer
wheel, hey presto, four white markings, so drills 4 new holes, all done by eye
fits the wheel the wrong way round, as it would not go over the caliper, and drives of to the garage to get his puncture repaired
i cant wait for the next bit, hahaha
he didnt have a puncture, but someone had unscrewed the valve so had no air in the tyre, so all of this could of been avoided, had he just used the
foot pump,
Does any one else have a friend or friends like this, as please tell, its not just me!
steve
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Peteff
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| posted on 11/8/12 at 07:17 AM |
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The old chap over the wall where we used to live had a son who was a bit of a whiz at diy. He fitted a socket to the wall in the garden so his dad
could mow the lawn easier using an ordinary domestic socket and some speaker wire and he also extended a gas pipe into the front room and fitted a gas
fire by cutting the old pipe off and jubilee clipped green hose pipe to it to connect it up. To be fair he did use the reinforced green hose pipe
though.
yours, Pete
I went into the RSPCA office the other day. It was so small you could hardly swing a cat in there.
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Ben_Copeland
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| posted on 12/8/12 at 03:17 PM |
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Any more  makes for good reading
Ben
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DIY Si
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| posted on 12/8/12 at 09:08 PM |
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quote: Originally posted by Peteff To be fair he did use the reinforced green hose pipe though.
Well it is the only sensible way of doing it after all!! 
“Let your plans be dark and as impenetratable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.”
Sun Tzu, The Art of War
My new blog: http://spritecave.blogspot.co.uk/
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tegwin
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| posted on 12/8/12 at 11:37 PM |
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I know a chap locally...still lives at home with his parents (he must be mid 40s).... Really nice guy but a bit rough... missing a few front
teeth..
Anyway.... he got a computer a few years ago and discovered the joys of internet dating... I pop round one afternoon and he is all excited about
this "hot" girl he had met online and that she was coming to visit... he showed me some photos... Well, I didnt want to offend the chap so
I just smiled and nodded at him... She must be knocking on 15 stone...the gold tooth was the winner for me...
Anyway... he decided that something had to be done about the "living at home" situation so be stole/purchased the shittiest touring
caravan I have ever seen and parked it in the field behind his parents house... Now this thing was utter junk, completely rotten, leaking and stunk of
shit..... Lord only knows how he had towed it there (or where on earth he had found such a scummy piece of detriutus) because it was falling to
pieces...
The last time I popped around I asked in passing how it was going with the "hot" lass..... Apparently she had turned up.. promptly put a
leg through the caravan floor and done a runner... Poor Clive.......
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