Mark Allanson
|
| posted on 10/5/26 at 09:50 PM |
|
|
Its been a bit rough of late
Its been a while! I was quite a prolific poster back in the day, throughout my build and after enjoying the car with my wife, Pat. I passed the SVA in
June 2005 and could often be seen driving around the Cornish lanes in the Se7en, our main recreation was going out for drives and exploring the lanes
and backroads of Cornwall right up to 2018 when Pat became unwell, her mobility was very much reduced.
I was working as a bodyshop manager, doing 50 hours a week and caring for Pat at home the rest of the time and in 2018 I had to SORN the Se7en. We
carried on like this until 2022, when in October, my father died and to be fair it was his time, he was 86 and was not enjoying life as he was largely
incapacitated, he had also loved going out in the Se7en, but couldn't get in or out in the last couple of years.
Just after this, Pat fell down stairs after feinting at the top step, and ended up in hospital, she was in for 28 days where they were testing to find
the cause of her falling, but found nothing wrong. Over the following weeks we spent time in hospitals having various tests to ascertain the problem.
Mid December, she became very ill at home and I called the Doctor to come out. He diagnosed a uterine infection and prescribed antibiotics which
didn't really help.
On the 11th December 2022, Pat too a turn for the worst, I called for an ambulance, the 999 switchboard answered, but said the ambulance serve were
busy and could I hold, they kept checking back but it took 17 minutes to get through to ambulance control, and the ambulance took a further 38 minutes
to arrive, by which time Pat had died. The post mortem revealed that she had a duodenum ulcer which had perforated causing a massive internal
bleed.
This left just me and my chocolate Labrador, Charley. He was missing Pat, quite often howling in the night, not understanding where she had gone. One
night just after Christmas, he had a particularly bad night and in the morning I found he had died in the night, he was 10 years old.
My Se7en is still in the garage, battery conditioner plugged in, polished up but in need of recommissioning, but I cannot bring myself to touch it. I
have to admit, my mental health isn't too good these days, I had to retire 7 years early (luckily I have private pensions which allow this), and
now spend my days pottering around the house trying to find things to keep myself occupied.
If you can keep you head, whilst all others around you are losing theirs, you are not fully aware of the situation
|
|
|
|
|
adithorp
|
| posted on 10/5/26 at 10:42 PM |
|
|
That's a terible series f events and you have my condolences. Given your father and wife's connection to the 7 I can understand your
reluctance to work on it but what eould they tell you? Leave it alone or get on with it?
Maybe the process of recommisining and using it is what you need?
"A witty saying proves nothing" Voltaire
http://jpsc.org.uk/forum/
|
|
|
SteveWalker
|
| posted on 10/5/26 at 10:46 PM |
|
|
I'm sorry, it sounds like you have had an awful time. My wife and I have had a bad time of it recently too, with her having serious health
problems and her sister dying.
Everyone is different, but for me, working on my kit-car and my classic Land Rover, is actually one of the escapes from reality, that temporarily puts
any problems out of mind.
|
|
|
Slimy38
|
| posted on 11/5/26 at 06:53 AM |
|
|
So sorry to hear of your goings-on, I can't imagine what things feel like for you at the moment. Some of my weekends are spent pottering, trying
to keep busy and getting to the end of the weekend with nothing to show for it. It must be several magnitudes worse to have that as your normal week
as well.
As others have said, it sounds like a car recommission is something that would really benefit your current mindset, but it is difficult to make that
first step into the garage to start. Perhaps start with a list of tasks, nothing bigger than 30 minutes, something you can look at and not got too
overwhelmed by the task in front of you?
Most of my car build has been to satisfy the need to escape, whether it's from work, from home life, even to take out my frustrations that I
didn't win the lottery for the hundredth time.
|
|
|
Mr Whippy
|
| posted on 11/5/26 at 07:32 AM |
|
|
 Sorry to hear that, they certainly have been rough.
All I can suggest is that you join one of the many "men's" clubs etc or take up a new hobby where you will find friendship and things
to focus on. There are also a lot of volunteer things that you may (depending on your own health) you might be able to participate and get some
enjoyment from. I am in quite a few model clubs (boats, plastic kits & RC aeroplanes) and many of the members really only turn up for a yap and
nothing more but are just as welcome. My folks go to the local dance club, my dad who can barely walk far less dance will never miss a meeting as most
of their friends they know go to it.
I find most car related things are quite solitary and although fun (sometimes) it is mostly just working by yourself.
Wish you all the best and come back and give an update. 
Oh yeah and get another dog...or a rabbit, I've just got one of those, it's super affectionate. Apparently its a giant one and is going to
be about the size of my dog!
[Edited on 11/5/26 by Mr Whippy]
|
|
|
gremlin1234
|
| posted on 11/5/26 at 10:09 AM |
|
|
welcome back
By posting here once again, you have managed a major step,
Well Done,
|
|
|
JAG
|
| posted on 11/5/26 at 10:56 AM |
|
|
Hi Mark, I'm so sorry to hear of your troubles.
The fight to maintain good mental health can be tricky - especially after a series of events like yours.
My own experience has been that working on my car has helped me feel better.
Getting it working and running again has made me feel very happy. Running the engine, driving it in and out of the garage etc... just the smell of a
warm engine in the garage - it all helps 
If it won't take too long I'd get the car back on the road and then get out and about in it.
The car will bring you happiness and company - people love to come and talk to drivers of unusual cars 
Whatever you decide I wish you luck 
Justin
Who is this super hero? Sarge? ...No.
Rosemary, the telephone operator? ...No.
Penry, the mild-mannered janitor? ...Could be!
|
|
|
swanny
|
| posted on 11/5/26 at 01:31 PM |
|
|
Mark Sorry to hear that you have had such a rough time.
I bought one of my kit cars from a chap who had built it and had lots of lovely times in it with his wife, but when she passed away he just felt that
it wasnt right to enjoy it after she had gone. He went on and found himself a bunch of new hobbies which werent in any way related but which gave him
a new focus.
Hopefully you either get you mojo to get back to the car or you find something else that you can get stuck into.
|
|
|
roadrunner
|
| posted on 11/5/26 at 02:54 PM |
|
|
|
|
|
jacko
|
| posted on 11/5/26 at 06:17 PM |
|
|
Hi Mark sorry about your loss it’s not good.
As others have said get that beautiful car out the garage and on the lovely roads where you live
And enjoy life .
Also welcome back to the mad house more the merry we need you and keep posting
Graham
555
|
|
|
MikeR
|
| posted on 12/5/26 at 07:10 AM |
|
|
You've had an awful few years & you also have my condolences for your losses.
Men tend to problems solve & I'll do that below, however talking is often what is needed. I've never knowingly met you, but if your want
to talk I'm happy to pick up a phone and talk cars, dogs or life.
It sounds like it might be an idea to find the local classic car clubs and pay them a visit. Your car history / experience will be very valued and
you'll get a new focus whilst staying car related & maybe wooden your social circle (or realise you can't get on with classic car owners
😁
|
|
|
falcor75
|
| posted on 12/5/26 at 09:06 AM |
|
|
That sounds like a rough turn of events you have my condolances. If I had been closer (and not located in Sweden) I would have offered to swing by and
help you get your car ready for the summer and maybe plan a few drives together. It does sound like you need to get out of the house a bit more with
people around you, maybe someone closer than me can do something?
|
|
|
Slater
|
| posted on 12/5/26 at 11:33 AM |
|
|
Sorry to hear about your losses Mark, it does sound a rough few years you've been through. As others have said, just try a few small steps at a
time, in whatever direction you feel. I know it's just a lump of metal/plastic but at least you still have the car and the knowledge to get it
back running again. I'm sure your wife and father would want you to enjoy the car again.
Also, the 3 things that I think help us men are:
* Being outside in the sun
* Exercise (specially if out in the sun)
* Being/talking with friends
Why do they call Port Harcourt "The Garden City"?...... Becauase they can't spell Stramash.
|
|
|
nick205
|
| posted on 12/5/26 at 12:20 PM |
|
|
Sorry to hear of your troubles Mark.
I can appreciate you may want to move the car on, but...
Since you built it, perhaps another build and use type hobby with other folk might help?
|
|
|
JoelP
|
| posted on 12/5/26 at 09:40 PM |
|
|
Hi Mark. Good to see you back. Sorry you've had such a bad time recently. Life can be very difficult sometimes. I hope you manage to find your
mojo - I'm sure your loved ones would want you to keep enjoying life on their behalves.
|
|
|
russbost
|
| posted on 13/5/26 at 08:52 AM |
|
|
Mark, such a sad series of events I can only sympathise & offer condolences. Life can be bloody tough at times & the older you get the more
people you lose around you, my apologies if that is further depressing, but a sad fact of life, I've had my own share of losses & hardships
in recent years & a brief period of depression.
There's nothing I or anyway else can say that can fix things, but just looking at all the messages above, most I would imagine from people
you've never met, it just goes to show how good these type of forums can be - it's certainly not all about cars & engineering
You don't say how your general health is, but if you're able too I'd suggest joining some local clubs, perhaps U3A might be useful to
you. Anything from a walking group to chess, bridge or many other things, there's a ton of stuff out there & sometimes just getting yourself
out of the house & spending some time chatting to other people can be a world of help
I play a bit of sport myself, anything from extremely bad golf, to badminton, tennis or pickleball, I also joined a running club just prior to Covid
& quite frankly that saved me from going nuts during all the lockdowns. An interest in almost anything is better than an interest in nothing &
it helps to take your mind off things even if only for an hour or so
Good luck & I hope you may find something that helps you along the way
I no longer run Furore Products or Furore Cars Ltd, but would still highly recommend them for Acewell dashes, projector headlights, dominator
headlights, indicators, mirrors etc, best prices in the UK! Take a look at http://www.furoreproducts.co.uk/ or find more parts on Ebay, user names
furoreltd & furoreproducts, discounts available for LCB users.
Don't forget Stainless Steel Braided brake hoses, made to your exact requirements in any of around 16 colours.
http://shop.ebay.co.uk/furoreproducts/m.html?_dmd=1&_ipg=50&_sop=12&_rdc=1
|
NOTE:This user is registered as a LocostBuilders trader and may offer commercial services to other users
|
jps
|
| posted on 14/5/26 at 09:00 AM |
|
|
Crikey Mark, sorry to read your post, troubles do seem to come along together sometimes and they are much harder to deal with like that...
I'm younger than you, mid-forties, but have also found myself in recent years at a bit of a crossroads in life. With a young family, COVID,
building up my career, and more latterly helping with relocating my poorly father, the hobbies - and social contact I had from them - were all put on
the back-burner for the last decade really. My children are not so young any more, and i've got some time back, but it's hard to start
again.
In the last couple of years I joined my local motor club; and have been getting out on some low level club motorsport events in the last year (both
competing and helping out). There are a real mix of ages, but plenty of opportunities to do something - including time that is spent waiting and
chatting with people about everything and nothing... I also joined my local 'model engineering society' - which has a more elderly
demographic - but i've had the chance to do some learning and developing of skills; using lathes/milling machines etc.
I wish you all the best; it's not easy to push yourself out of a situation; but there are plenty of kind people you'll come across.
|
|
|
nick205
|
| posted on 14/5/26 at 12:13 PM |
|
|
Mark,
Next to my local Scout hut there's a branch of the "Men's Sheds Association".
A big shed where local guys meet up and repair, re-purpose, make all sorts of things for the local community.
https://menssheds.org.uk/
I believe there are branches across the UK (I think Billy Connolly was a member of one in Glasgow).
Might be worth a look as a way of meeting people and getting putting some practical skills to use.
|
|
|
