iscmatt
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 10:44 AM |
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My letter to Mr Darling
Dear Mr. Darling,
Please find below my suggestion for fixing Britain's economy.
Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:
There are about 20 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1 million apiece severance for early retirement with the following
stipulations:
1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed
2) They MUST buy a new British car. Twenty million cars ordered - Auto Industry fixed
3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed
4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university - Crime rate fixed
5) They MUST buy £50 of alcohol/tobacco a week ......and there's your money back in duty/tax etc
It can't get any easier than that!
P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances
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minitici
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 10:47 AM |
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There is an undeniable logic to your argument 
PS - I'm over 50 
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tendoshingan
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 10:51 AM |
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Faultless, do it immediately
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cd.thomson
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 10:51 AM |
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I love it!
only issue is that the UK has a population of 61 million... a third of those are between 50 and 65? 
Craig
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Mr Whippy
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 10:53 AM |
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am I right in thinking your plan will cost the tax payer £20,000,000,000,000?! does the UK even have that much money?
Fame is when your old car is plastered all over the internet
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richardh
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 10:54 AM |
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i love it...............
Time for a change!
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cd.thomson
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 10:59 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by Mr Whippy
am I right in thinking your plan will cost the tax payer £20,000,000,000,000?! does the UK even have that much money?
if theres one thing ive learnt during this economic crisis (specifically considering quantitative easing) virtually all money in the entire system is
"imaginary". The country is however many billions of pounds in debt, yet Gordon keeps spending.. Its monopoly money.
Craig
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scudderfish
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:00 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by Mr Whippy
am I right in thinking your plan will cost the tax payer £20,000,000,000,000?! does the UK even have that much money?
£20 trillion pounds does hurt a bit, easily done though, just slap a £500,000 tax on every one under the age of 50.
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smart51
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:08 AM |
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It seems you're even more Authoritarian than the current government, which is saying something. I'm not saying you're fascist or
anything but you seem to lean that way.
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macspeedy
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:10 AM |
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and bring Jezza to power 
Like the plan, if only 
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nick205
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:30 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by smart51
It seems you're even more Authoritarian than the current government, which is saying something. I'm not saying you're fascist or
anything but you seem to lean that way.
I disagree - this is what we need someone with clarity of thinking, a practical business plan for UK PLC (in which we're all increasing
shareholders) and the metal to pull it off.
ISCMATT for president I say
(and yes, that does mean I tink we should pension off the Royals ASAP )
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nick205
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:33 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by macspeedy
and bring Jezza to power
Like the plan, if only
....YEAH - Jezza could be the Transport and Environment Minister
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James
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:35 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by Mr Whippy
£20,000,000,000,000?! does the UK even have that much money?
£20 Trillion! That's about twice the value of the entire World economy isn't it?
To quote George Bush Senior: "A Billion here, a Billion there, it's soon adds up to real money!".
Cheers,
James
[Edited on 14/5/09 by James]
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"The fight is won or lost far away from witnesses, behind the lines, in the gym and out there on the road, long before I dance under those lights."
- Muhammad Ali
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mad-butcher
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:40 AM |
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I'm nearly 60 can I have an extra bonus, and if I give you 30,000 back can I be exempt from the british car bit
tony
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Mr Whippy
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:58 AM |
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My idea for over 50's is far more efficient...how much does a bullet cost?
note :- this policy only lasts for 15 years, till just before I turn 50
Fame is when your old car is plastered all over the internet
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GeorgeM
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 11:59 AM |
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I thought you could have a British built
car for £250.00
GeorgeM
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scudderfish
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 12:04 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by Mr Whippy
My idea for over 50's is far more efficient...how much does a bullet cost?
note :- this policy only lasts for 15 years, till just before I turn 50
How thoroughly ungreen of you! Don't you realise that bullets are one shot only and not reusable? Crowbar to the back of the head is much more
environmentally sound.
This is turning into Logan's Run.........mmmmmmm
Sorry, I was just having a Jenny Agutter moment there.
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Daddylonglegs
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 12:44 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by tendoshingan
Faultless, do it immediately
Ditto! Vote for Matt
It looks like the Midget is winning at the moment......
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sucksqueezebangblow
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 01:15 PM |
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Perfect, but please wait three more years to implement it!
Better to Burnout than to Fade Away JET METAL ~ AndySparrow © 
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Echidna
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 02:15 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by iscmatt
Dear Mr. Darling,
Please find below my suggestion for fixing Britain's economy.
Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:
There are about 20 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1 million apiece severance for early retirement with the following
stipulations:
1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed
2) They MUST buy a new British car. Twenty million cars ordered - Auto Industry fixed
3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed
4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university - Crime rate fixed
5) They MUST buy £50 of alcohol/tobacco a week ......and there's your money back in duty/tax etc
It can't get any easier than that!
P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances
Nice, but to do this you have to change the form of government first!
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NOTE:This user is registered as a LocostBuilders trader and may offer commercial services to other users
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woodster
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 02:25 PM |
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Its a better idea than anything Mr Clown and Mr Starling have come up with ............... its time for a revolution .............. monster loony
party for me next time
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MautoK
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 02:39 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by iscmatt
Dear Mr. Darling,
Please find below my suggestion for fixing Britain's economy.
Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:
There are about 20 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1 million apiece severance for early retirement with the following
stipulations:
1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed
2) They MUST buy a new British car. Twenty million cars ordered - Auto Industry fixed
3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed
4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university - Crime rate fixed
5) They MUST buy £50 of alcohol/tobacco a week ......and there's your money back in duty/tax etc
It can't get any easier than that!
P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances
OK, I've done/doing all that!
Except #2 is a 9 1/2 year old Peugeot 306 (unless you count an MK as a new British car)
Do I still get my million? Or do I put it on expenses? 
He's whittling on a piece of wood. I got a feeling that when he stops whittling, something's gonna happen. (OUATITW/Cheyenne)
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Ivan
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 02:49 PM |
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I think the idea is sound but spoilt by too many MUSTS which is typical of any government so you don't get my vote - there is only one must
required:
They must use the money to start a business and employ 2 people not of their own family.
Now given their years of experience the business is more likely to succeed than other startups so huge economic and employment benifits will arrise.
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Mark Allanson
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 09:02 PM |
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Getting back all the swindled money from 600+ MP's would help out a bit - and a little more practical
If you can keep you head, whilst all others around you are losing theirs, you are not fully aware of the situation
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Ninehigh
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| posted on 14/5/09 at 10:00 PM |
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British cars? Where?
I don't think I could stomach 20 million pensioners getting in my way doing 35 on a 70 road in a Speed 6!
Unless Vauxhalls (made down the road from me), Nissans (made in Sunderland) etc are also allowed.
Make it £100,000 and maybe the numbers will add up a bit better, hell make it £500,000 I'm nowhere near that age
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